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eviljim.com Posts

ahh, yes, tasty crack cocaine

Okay, so altoids introduces a new candy and shoves it down those mini-aisles that entangle the checkout area. The candy looks innocent enough, surely, as you can see below:

innocent.jpg

Yup, a perfectly innocent candy treat, right? Yeah, until you open it:

rock.jpg

You see, apparently it is now legal to package, distribute, and sell sour crack conviniently placed near your checkout lane. Mmmm, crack.

nectar of the gods

Pepsi Blue is the most tasty beverage I’ve had in a long time. Seriously. For some reason someone in Ohio mailed me twelve bottles and I’m quite glad they did. The stuff won’t hit the shelves until August 5th and I now realize I must ration my 10 remaining bottles so I don’t run out before then.

Try it, really, once it comes out. You won’t regret the greatalicious flavor. (It tastes, I should mention, like blue. If you ever freebased blue, it would be this.)

Mmmmm.

maybe i’m just weird

We all get angry at one point or another — sure, the things that upset each of us vary, but there’s something that’s guaranteed to tick off each and every one of us.

The thing that bothers me above all else — and bear with me here, because I’m not sure if this happens to other people — is when I’ll get pissed off about something in particular… then, while still being pissed, forget completely WHY I originally got pissed off. It just bothers me beyond all belief that I HAVE a good reason to be ticked off, but just can’t remember it.

So, really, does this happen to anyone but me?

short stories about ohio

I like to think that, for some reason, small events often set the mood for occassions. A subtle joke, a passing animal, a strange looking local freak… whatever. Sometimes you can just see something and say ‘okay, I know exactly how this weekend is going to go.’

This weekend I went on a trip with some friends of mine, including my soon-to-be-school-roommate Brian. On our way to Destination Ohio by car (anywhere from a 5 to, sadly, 9 hour ride) we stopped at one of Indiana’s beautiful and scenic rest stops for lunch.

I take a look to my left, and immediately, I know exactly how this weekend is going to go. This is what pulled up:

lamers.jpg

Yeah. That’s the stuff.

Reasons My Kid Is Crying

Step 1: if you haven’t yet seen the Tumblr of the same name, you should.

Step 2: read this review about the book of the same name.

Schadenfreude is a funny thing. Literally. It’s hilarious to laugh at the pain of others. More so when their pain is caused by nonsense.

The book is more of the same thing that makes the blog great. When reading this I didn’t have a child, but this gives a great picture into what it’s like to have one. Children are much like drunk adults, they don’t know what is good for them. So a simple picture of a child crying, say, because he can’t drown himself in a lake is good entertainment.

In many ways, being more of the same is great — the book is entertaining and a fun read. On the other hand, reading it all at once it starts to blend together and takes a bit of the fun edge off. I’d suggest reading this slowly, enjoying it like a wine and not like a visit to the Old Country Buffet.