Last day at Microsoft: 10/20
First day at Google: 11/6
Probably will try to fly to Illinois somewhere in there, if there’s a good Ding fare, since I won’t be there for Thanksgiving. My first week (the week of 11/6) I get flown down to Mountain View, which is kind of neat.
Friday night I slept on a cot in my mom and brother’s room, as the rest of my family got in Saturday, and then I’d have someone with whom to share a room. Saturday morning my mom proclaims, “I think I smell like fish.”
My mom says a lot of weird things, so at first I just ignored her.
But she kept saying it, over and over again. “I think I smell like fish,” she would say. Sometimes followed up by, “someone smell me.”
Neither my brother nor I wanted to.
Eventually she forced Chris to, and he confirmed. “You smell,” he screamed, “you smell like fish, now go away.” He pushed her away.
Dora was now left to ponder why she might smell like fish. “I took a bath, I don’t see why I would smell like fish.” She kept telling us other little tidbits, like that when she went down to get coffee, people in the elevator moved away from her. This fish smell, of mysterious origin, was becoming an issue.
“I even put some nice things in the bath, the hotel had some bath beads.” By this point I wasn’t paying attention much anymore, because the fish odor was most likely going to remain a mystery.
Maybe 5 minutes later she added, “they weren’t very good quality, they didn’t open themselves. I had to pop them open myself.”
Again, no response, so a few minutes later, she kept talking. “And they didn’t bubble up very much, so I had to use all four.”
This is when the pieces came together. I had remembered that, on the counter, next to the shampoo, my brother had put four gelcaps. I then also realized there were no bath sales or such things in the bathroom, either.
“Did you take a bath in Chris’ vitamins?”
She was not the first to reply, it was Chris. “My fish oil capsules!!”
So there it is, my mother had bathed with four popped fish oil capsules and didn’t even realize it. The worst part was after I left the room and came back in – the smell was overpowering. It was like 10 people had went deep sea fishing and lived the rest of their lives in that room, then died, and people covered them in fish as some form of strange tribute.
In the end we had to switch rooms, and quite possibly Mandaly Bay has condemned that room (19306). I do know that I passed by a cleaning cart parked outside that room, and strange and angry words were being shouted between 4 or 5 ladies in there, in some language I do not speak.
So at work I’m being forced (yes, forced) to use Office 2007. I believe this relates to us somehow not being prehistoric creatures. I just want to go on record saying this is against my will.
Anyway, here are some issues I found so far. Enjoy. This is your future.
One nice addition is the sidebar. Don’t get me wrong here – most of this post is me complaining – but this is a nice new feature. On the side you get a little todo list. On this todo list are your todo items. Here is a picture of one of my todo items.
Let’s say I’ve completed it, because I’m a diligent worker. Where would you click to mark it complete?
If you’re me, you’d click that little checkbox. You’d click it five times. You would do this because Office is quite slow and you figure the first few just didn’t “take” – so you keep clicking. Nothing would happen.
You see, whomever designed this feature decided you would, in fact, have to click the little flag. This is apparently what people in the Office division do. They finish something on their todo list, grab a flag (I assume they all have these attached to their desks), and wave it around signifying they have completed their task. That is why this system makes sense to them.
Here’s another fun one. Suppose your manager sends you a task to complete. You usually accept or reject the task.
Apparently whomever designed this thought it’s more likely you will delete your task. And then view details (which, for a task you are just sent, are pretty useless).
This leads to the most annoying bug in the world. It affects me every time I try to send a mail.
When I click an icon to send, I expect it to be in the upper-left. That’s where it should be. That’s where it always is. Now, this is where they decided to put – for some reason – “Paste.” That is right. So instead of sending mails, I keep pasting crap into them.
The last thing I have is (again) in Outlook. In the other Office applications, if you hit something like “Alt-E” (used to be Edit) and then U (Undo, under the Edit menu) there are no menus, but they know people still use their old shortcuts, so it lets you get away with it. No such luck in Outlook. So instead of undoing something, I keep just hearing a subtle beep to tell me I’ve stepped out of line. I believe they should hook up some kind of electrical shock system.
At least I’d learn faster.
A few “firsts” this weekend:
* Riding a ferry
* Visiting a rainforest
* Staying in an ocean-front cabin
* Going like 50 hours without internet access (seriously!)
The net result was a lot of pictures and an almost-broken leg.
Let’s attack these in a random order.
First, rainforests. Apparently these are not much different than regular forests. The major thing I noticed is that the trees are fuzzy. Witness for yourself the fuzzy:
It was pretty neat, though somewhat crowded (with people) for the wilderness. It was worth seeing, if only to say “I’ve been to a rainforest” to any potential grand-children. I assume they will look at me, suspiciously and with glazed eyes betraying their feelings of boredom, and state something like “those are fictional.” Not because they’ll be gone, but most likely because they will be somewhat special. Probably lots of owl posters.
Second, riding a ferry. This was about as exciting as driving a car onto a boat can possibly be. I do not usually get sea-sick, but sitting in a motionless car on a moving boat disturbed me. Greatly.
Third, to keep up the random order, is going without internet. I must say this was not something necessary; despite staying in the middle of nowhere (actually, one of the most western points of nowhere), every hotel offered wifi and proudly proclaimed this on their signs. The cabin didn’t have such amenities (no phone, no TV, no internet; it did have power outlets though), so I didn’t bring the laptop. I think the weirdest thing was I got home and it took me like 20 minutes to realize, hey, I can check my email. It was at that point I almost broke my leg running up the stairs.
Last, the cabin. My co-worker Rob recommended this place called La Push. It was awesome, practically on the beach, and it was quite relaxing.
Also, I got some good use out of my camera this weekend. I was surprised that despite taking 300 pictures, the batteries did not die. Also, I only half-filled up my memory card. These two things are frightening as I was certainly in, as Shane would say, “Japanese Tourist” mode.