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This Just In – My Lunch Has Been Stolen

Brian stole and then devoured my delicious lunch I had been looking forward to eating all day. Without so much as even asking, or, say, MENTIONING to me.

What kind of person would just STEAL the lunch of one’s roommate? A bad person, that’s what. I’m hungry and I have nothing to eat, because my chicken has been stolen. And if you know anything about me, you’ll know one thing — I like chicken. Especially eating it, but also looking at it, too.

Published inTrue Stories


  1. Anonymous Anonymous

    Unless said chicken is the renounded charcoal chicken from Great America.. It’s burned on the outside, but it’s frozen on the inside so it evens out heh

  2. cc cc

    Have you seen Friends? You sound like Ross, when someone ate his turkey sandwich with the moistmaker inside…leftover from thanksgiving…anyone? does anyone know what i’m talking about?

  3. Jim Jim

    There are some fundamental differences.

    1) This is chicken, not Turkey.

    2) It was fried, not in sandwich form

    3) Brian is not a cast member of Friends

    4) I know who stole my chicken; Ross quested to find out who took his chicken

    5) I’m going to eat Brian’s soul

  4. Dan Dan

    You want to know an easy way to avoid this problem in the future? Don’t buy any more chicken. Then he won’t be able to eat it.

  5. Anonymous Anonymous

    Smelling chicken is also good.

  6. Anonymous Anonymous

    This is a great page. And the contents are really that worth reading. I will add this to my own library

  7. Anonymous Anonymous

    “MYYY CHICKEN??? MYYYYYY CHICKEN?????” Dude, go buy another chicken.

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